8 Ballers

Yet another glorious morning greeted the 8 early birds. Unfortunately the pretty sorry state of the greens rendered the first round of the 8 baller order of merit a non qualifier.

Nonetheless unheard of amounts of pre-round practice was being had in the nets, putting and chipping green in order to try to find some form for the start of the new season.

Mike finally arrived at 7:45 which caused a stampede to the pro shop to get the comp fees paid and the season underway.

The first proper balls in the hat drawed had Stan, Chris, Fordy and Mike in the first group, John, Paul, Steve and Tim in the 2nd.

Mike stepped onto the first tee to get the season underway and duly sliced his drive almost onto the 18th, very much a sign of things to come. Fordy did much the same. Stan surpassed both shots by hitting the tree and finding the first early bath of the season. Boringly Chris found the first fairway with what looked like a bounce over the stream.

Some steady golf followed until Tim blocked his shot to the first green onto the 2nd tee almost taking Chris’s head off as he was teeing off.

The nearest the pin on 3 produced 4 atrocious tee shots which never threatened the green let along give anyone a chance of getting the first 2’s and associated balls of the year.

Tim produced a 2nd, more concerted, effort get the first group to speed up shortly after. He waited an age in the 6th fairway to play his second to the green. Was he waiting for the greenkeeper to finish his strimming of the bunker or was he waiting for Chris to get into pole position to pounce. Stan urged him to get on with it and he duly obliged by clearing the pond, bank, bunkers, green and hitting the bank, bouncing on the path and ending on the bank of the 7th tee, a mere 2 yards from Chris. Some stunningly accurate approach play which probably wasn’t repeated for the rest of the round.

Mike got the first groups only bird in slightly lucky circumstances. What turned out to be a great decision to leave the flag in, actually because he was so far away to see the hole without it in, allowed it to act as a great backstop for a putt which was dead straight, but 3 inches left of the hole all the way but hit a hole on the green and moved 45 degrees right to drop in.

A fairly undramatic few holes followed, no balls on the green on 11, a 2nd Stan waterball in the ditch to the right of 12, a nice chip out of the ditch from Chris on 13, more poor shots on the nearest the pin on 14, hacks out of the trees on 15, a cracking drive from Stan on 16, which according to John’s description was only about 200 yards short of winning the longest drive.

Despite assurances that we would finally hit a green on a par 3 on 17 this was wholly inaccurate as another set of woeful shots departed to all parts of the course bar the 17th green.

A few pars on the 18th brought another enjoyable round to its conclusion.

From the first group, Stan knocked in 39 pts, Chris and Mike 38 and Fordy 33.

Stan’s tally ultimately taking the 8 baller order of merit first 10 pointer of the season, which was duly rewarded with an excellent speech and presentation of the 8 Ball Bandit of the Day Trophy to Stan by Paul. Appropriately from one bandit to another.

Although the second group were right up our arses all game I don’t have much to report, however John was seen to knock a couple of nearest the pins on 11 and 17. He also hit a 452 yard longest drive on 16, nearly on the front of the green don’t you know. Perhaps the most amusing moment, apart from John having a kip on the 12th fairway was Steve giving Tim some abuse, well deserved to be fair, for walking straight in front of him whilst he was chipping on to 11. Priceless.

Ron, the 9th 8 Baller, there is something wrong there, to play the comp duly arrived as beers and lunch were consumed by the other 8. A few comments were made on his state of dress on arrival, including threats to chuck him out of the club, but a miracle transformation occurred and he emerged from the clubhouse looking like a proper golfer, albeit he had to borrow the competition entry fee to play ! Well done on a 33 pointer and some points earned on the order of merit.

Lets hope next week brings the 1st qualifier of the year, however looking at those greens I doubt it.

Following new pages added :

• Masters Prediction Results
• Seasons Predictions League Table
• Handicap Tracker with current handicaps
• Handicap Predictions Page

Updated Pages

Comp fees paid to include the new Masters and Handicap Predictions Competitions and to politely identify outstanding fees !

A bright and crisp morning welcomed the early birds on to the 1st tee.
Stan, Tim, Paul and Mike and were joined by new recruit Steve who was playing his 3rd handicap qualifying round. Welcome to the group Steve. Usual comps for all but Steve, primarily to allow him to concentrate on his card rather than worrying which bandit to give loads of cash to post round.

With Paul yet to get his official handicap from the club we tried to convince him to play off a 15 handicap that will surely hit him very soon, but in the end we agreed on letting him play his last Weds morning round off a ridiculous 20. Would this prove costly ?

A fairly uneventful start, aside from a mass, and ultimately successful, search for Steve’s MUFC ball in the penalty area to the left of the 2nd led us to the first nearest the pin. Tim knocked his majestically onto the green, no one else got close, so some early cash in the bank for Tim and the first 3 pointer of the day.

Tim played some excellent golf over the first 5 holes to keep level with Stan but then it appeared that the effects of the previous nights alcohol started to wain and another mass search took place to find his second to the 6th. This ultimately proved fruitless and resulted in agreement that the ball must be in the hazard, as we’d scoured the hole of that part of the course, and ultimately led to a 6 and his first 1 pointer of the day.

The group took full advantage of the first winter green on the 9th, all recording 4 for 3s but with 4 completely different ways of playing the hole.

At halfway Stan lead with a majestic 22 (with cries of bandit ringing around the 10th tee), Paul 2nd on 20, Tim 3rd on 18, Mike last on 17.

2 abysmal shots on 10 resulted in 2 completely different results. Stan bounced one over the brook onto the winter green and knocked in for a 2 pointer, whilst Pauls stayed in the ditch and resulted in a first blob for the group.

The 11th hole made Tim some more cash as he once again was the only one to hit the green. Steve’s MUFC ball had lived a charmed life but despite an initial rescue from the stream in front of 11 was duly returned there next shot and was lost for ever. Much to the disgusts of the City contingent he pulled another from the bag for the rest of the round. The 12th saw Stan very generously concede a putt to Paul not realising it was for a 4 for 4.

Tim continued his dominance of the nearest the pins by taking the 14th, with the other 3 members of the group not having managed to put one on the dance floor on any of the 3 previous holes. Tim was very reserved in his appreciation of his own brilliance, as I’m sure you can imagine ! I’m sure he mentioned it a couple of times on the 15th too, whereas the rest of the crew quietly sniggered that he’d 3 putted on the 14th having won the nearest the pin.

Paul continued an impressive full house of fairways hit on the 16th and with his great drive being the only ball on the fairway was good enough to take the longest drive. This had been preceded by both Tim and Stan trying to take out some of the roll-up on the 10th tee with some power fades. Mike then took advantage of the flowerpot on the 16th winter green to roll in the only birdie of the day.

Tee shots on the 17th were all woeful. Tim’s deserving a special mention as it very nearly landed on the 18th tee, so a nearest the pin in 2 on 18 was rapidly introduced, which Paul took with an excellent 2nd shot to about 13 ft to just pip Mikes effort. Stan let the side down on 18 by missing his putt for a 4 for 3 but ultimately his back 9 20 pts was good enough to take the cash.

Final scores :

Stan 22+20 = 42
Paul 20+16 = 36
Mike 17 + 18 = 35 (ocb)
Tim 18 + 17 = 35
Tim – 3 nearest the pins
Paul – longest drive and a nearest pin in 2
Mike – 1 birdie

Thanks to Tim for paying for this weeks cookies out of his winnings.

Roll on next week and hope that the greens have improved so that it can be the first qualifier of the year. Even if it isn’t it constitutes the first round of the season long order of merit (21 planned events)

With The Masters at Augusta no more than a couple of days away it would be remiss of me not to suggest a return of last seasons major golf predictions comp, however I’d like to introduce a twist this year.

Cost will be £5 each per major, but there will be 2 comps running :

The first is the usual prediction for each major. i.e the 8 baller(s) who pick the player who comes nearest to the top of the leaderboard will take home 50% of the entry fees for that major.

The second comp will be a season long one across the 4 majors. 8 ballers will pick players prior to each major and points will be awarded for the players finishing position. I.e. 9 points for a win, 8 for second down to 1 for last. Scores will be summed for each of the 4 majors to find a winner who will take home the remaining 50% of the season pot, albeit a ‘crap predictor’ prize for the consistently worst predictor would be worth a laugh.

Any thoughts ?

A split field today. Tim, Stan, Paul and Mike out at 7:30. John, Chris and Ron at 11:30. Chucky disappointingly failing to show for the later group.

The early 4 ball decided on the usual comps, front 9, back 9, overall, 4 nearest the pins, longest drive and because this wasn’t nearly complicated enough threw in a doubles challenge of Tim & Stan v Mike & Paul.

Following some initial discussions on the tee it was agreed Paul would play of a handicap of 20, a somewhat optimistic view of what his handicap will be following his recent 3 qualifying rounds (92,91 & 87). Sorry mate that’s gotta be a 17 handicap to start with.

Plenty of bunker action on the first was followed by cursing from all on each tee as it became apparent that the greens team were managing to outpace us round the course with the spiking machine, meaning it was winters from 2 to 4, 5 on propers, 6 to 8 on temps. 9 on a proper, 10 on a temp, 11, 12, 13 on propers, 14 & 15 temps, 16, 17, 18 on propers. We managed to get ahead of the greens team on 18 and they kindly waited until we’d finished before moving the pin to a ridiculously easy position right down at the front of the green when we’d played to the flag so far back on the green it looked like it was in the car park.

Front 9 finished with Tim in the lead with 24 from Paul and Mike 22 and Stan 16. The doubles challenge standing at 25 pts apiece, Stan’s only contribution coming on the 6th 🙂

The turning point of the doubles contest was an extremely close nearest the pin contest on 11. A rollover situation meant the stakes were high and I was probably the creator of the issue by declaring Tim the winner from the 3 shots that were on the green, none of which were mine. Paul used the full powers of his surveying expertise and challenged the decision which resulted in a dubious pigeon step measurement attempt (Paul) which was ridiculed by everyone. Then followed a similarly poor attempt (again by Paul) which was reminiscent of Monty Python at his best. Ultimately we had to resort to measuring using the flag. 2 flag lengths apiece meant the result was determined using my 58 wedge. The final measurement concluded that Paul had indeed won the rollover by the sizeable margin of 2 inches, good challenge sir.

From this point Stan’s form continued to desert him, and Tim’s putting got lost as he managed to 3 putt 3 times coming in. Paul continued his great form by knocking in 17 points on the last 7 holes, to go with the 6 he scored on 10 and 11, meaning he came back in an excellent 23 points to add to his 22 first 9 haul, guaranteeing him back 9 and overall with an excellent 45 points. I can write this as his doubles partner, but there were numerous bandit references in the clubhouse afterwards.

Final results from group 1 :
Paul 45, Tim 43, Mike 41, Stan 30
Paul – 4 nearest the pins (2 rollovers)
Tim – longest drive (an excellent set of drives all day with the new Ping driver)
Doubles – Mike & Paul – 51, Tim & Stan – 45
Best 2 from 4 for the 4 ball – 100

We then had the great honour of watching John, Chris and Ron tee off from the comfort of the clubhouse with a cool pint in hand and some excellent cheesy chips to scoff.

I can’t write much about the rest of the round but the start of it wasn’t the quality golf we were expecting. Chris found the stream, John the tree and Ron appeared to wander off on his own wondering what he’d let himself in for. There must have been some good golf played though as the final scores were : Ron 42, John 39, Chris 36.

A final mention for Tim the rules official, and one for all to note as the season progresses. There were calls for a disqualification on the 18th (from Tim in order to try and take the spoils from Paul) as Paul had marked his ball on the green and then moved his marker to get it off Stan’s line, but then failed to replace it when making his final putt. It was a light-hearted comment, not quite in the same league as Garcia vs Kuchar last weekend, but one that is well worth remembering, by players and playing partners, to try to avoid those DQ situations when the qualifying comps come round.

Another enjoyable round and roll on the first comp on the 17th, and the handicap reductions that should follow.

The site editor would like to offer the following profound apologies :

to Tim who shot a magnificent 46 points today, including superb birdies on 8 and 13, but for unknown reasons was omitted from the match report.

to John who only scored 38 points on a massively short course with flower pot holes. Birdies on 1,2 & 12 not enough to breach the 40 point mark that everyone else achieved.

Well played all.

Chris let the side down by not turning out for todays challenge match leaving a 4 vs 3 game. Tim, Stan and Ron set out as the advanced party, safe in the knowledge that John, Mike, Paul and Steve had no chance of keeping up with the. True to form they were 3 holes ahead on the 9th and finished a good hour before the stragglers came in (albeit the 4 ball went round in 3 hrs 30)

Initial scores in the clubhouse were Tim, Stan and Ron an impressive 101 playing best 2 from 3, with John, Mike, Steve and Paul taking advantage of the extra man by posting an impressive 107.

Congratulations to Ron who knocked 44 points off 8 for a net level par round, well done mate.

Mike was randomly selected as a 4th player by Stan, and that proved to be a good choice all round as this contributed an extra 6 points to bring the scores all level. Each team had 7 birdies, well done all, the nearest the pins were shared 2 a piece with Mike taking the longest drive.

An honourable draw all round followed by an excellent lunch and a few beers in the sun outside the clubhouse.

Just need some proper greens to play on now !

Good luck to Stan who starts his chemotherapy treatment tomorrow.

Get well soon mate, looking forward to seeing you back out on the course again very soon.

Stan, Paul and Terry took on John, Mike and Kris.

Best 2 from 3 Team Stableford with Team Nearest the Pins and Longest Drives. Usual stakes and prizes.

John, Mike and Kris won the front nine (49 to 46), the back nine (42 to 41) and overall (91 to 87), plus the longest drive. Please note Stan, Paul and Terry’s card doesn’t reflect an excellent 3 from Paul on the 8th.

Stan, Paul and Terry won all 4 nearest the pins (albeit the 3rd was carried over and the 17th had no marker !).

Birdie count was team John, Mike and Kris 5, team Stan, Paul and Terry 2.

Paul takes this weeks bandit prize with a Stan like 44 points !

I have a fantastic, not quite once in a lifetime but pretty damn good, golfing prize, worth more than £50, that I’m going to donate as a raffle prize to raise funds to buy this years competition trophies.

Entry Fee will be £5 and once all entry fees have been received the draw will be performed and the winner notified of the excellent prize that they have won.

Remember, you’ve got to be in it to win it !